Sunday, January 18, 2009

Barack Obama Escapes Custody, Flees

(CNN) -- An Illinois judge Monday froze the assets of Barack Obama (a/k/a Barry Soetoro), the charismatic Muslim-Christian Democratic superstar who authorities say tried to fake his way into the White House by claiming he was an American-loving talented citizen. Barack Obama sometime early Monday morning, as guards watched faked C-Span tape of the Inaugural festivities, scaled the walls of a maximum security CIA facility in Maine, and investigators are looking for him and four brutally beaten bodyguards, police say.

Investigators looking into his business dealings for possible securities violations and illegal immigration paper forgeries requested the temporary restraining order in Lake County Superior Court, said Henry Palen, spokesman for the Illinois Secretary of State.

He said the order, which also applies to Obama's wife, Michelle, and to his twenty-three T-shirt and bumper sticker companies, is aimed at protecting investors, and is related to a receivership filing. He didn't elaborate.

Barack Hussein Obama and his staff, the DNC, Congress and approximately 21.4 million voters are "the subjects of an active investigation by the FBI," Palen said. Public documents list Obama as President-elect of the United States of America, in Washington, D.C.

A search warrant related to the inquiry was served January 17, Palin said.
According to Chicago Tribune, Michelle Obama attempted to withdraw $326,844 on December 30. The ATM only dispensed $500 so she went to a local Fast Cash and Loan near the O'Hare International Airport. A hearing was set for February 5 to examine her mental competency.

Military aircraft from three nearby airbases, which were dispatched to track down the escapee reported seeing a White Ford Bronco going slowly in some woods, 35 minutes after the escape. The vehicle was lost due to heavy foliage, Lt. Col. Mark Tracy reported.

The nations largest-ever manhunt will has commenced, without the awareness of the American people. "The (faked) Inauguration will go on, President George W. Bush said, "I'm not staying another day in this brutal town."

The Dow Jones Industrial Average (being run on scripted computerized pre-programming) calmed those who read rumors of the events of the past 48 hours. Federal Chairman Ben Bernanke has ordered all media outlets to embargo facts until Mr. Obama is captured. "The 75% Rule is now suspended. You folks are to report NO facts at all during this crisis," he warned invia webinars mass-distributed via the National Press Club Center in Washington, D.C.

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